What to Say When Someone Offers to Help - But Doesn’t Follow Through

You’ve heard it a hundred times:

“Just let me know if you need anything.”

And yet… they never show up. No texts. No visits. No actual help.

You’re doing everything - and they’re nowhere to be found.

So how do you respond when people say they want to help, but never follow through? Without blowing up, shutting down, or losing faith in humanity?

Let’s talk about it.

Why People Say It (But Don’t Mean It)

1. They Want to Feel Helpful - Without the Effort

Saying “let me know if you need anything” gives the illusion of caring without committing to actual labor.

2. They Don’t Know What to Do

Some people freeze. They don’t want to do it wrong — so they do nothing. It’s not an excuse. But it’s real.

3. They Genuinely Forgot

It hurts to admit, but caregiving isn’t top of mind for most people. You’re in the trenches. They’re not. That distance breeds forgetfulness — and neglect.

What You Can Say Instead of Smiling and Swallowing It

Option 1: Give a Specific Ask

“Thanks for offering - we could really use someone to pick up groceries this week.”

Let them rise to the occasion - or self-select out.

Option 2: Be Honest - Without Being Cruel

“I’ve noticed you offered help a while ago, but we haven’t heard from you. We’re feeling pretty alone in this.”

Sometimes people need to hear the truth in order to step up.

Option 3: Let It Go and Reframe the Role

“They’re not part of the support system — and that’s okay.”

Not everyone will show up. The power is in knowing who will.

Your Energy Deserves Protection

You don’t owe unlimited grace to people who disappear. You deserve support that shows up - in action, not just words.

At Willow & Wells, We Show Up. Period.

Willow & Wells doesn’t just offer help - we deliver it. With calm, consistency, and care you can count on. Every time.

Join the Willow & Wells Community

We’re building something for people who are tired of doing this alone.

If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, overlooked, or just plain exhausted by the system… You’re exactly who we made this for.

Caregiving is hard enough. Finding help shouldn’t be.

Get early access to everything we’re working on - tools, guides, and real talk that helps.